Thanks for the visit

In this instance the photo above is not a mudra(1). It is how I count repetitions in my pranayama (breathing) practice. To count to ten I place my thumb at the bottom of my ring finger (one). Half way up the ring finger (two). Top of the ring finger (three). Top of pinky finger (four). Top of ring finger (five). Top of middle finger (six). Top of index finger (seven). Then back the other way to top of middle finger (eight). Top of ring finger (nine). Top of pinky finger (10). I have tried to count using beads but it does not work for me. (I have difficulty with dexterity and sensation).

This photo represents the number six or eight (middle finger) as I count in my pranayama practice. It’s how I was taught to count while I’m doing my breathing practice. I also use a metronome app to make sure that those counts / breaths are equal. In essence I time my inhale and exhale durations.

During this mornings practice I was on my deck. Sun on my face sitting underneath a hummingbird feeder at that exact number, six. When I could not not tell where my fingers were. I could not tell (feel) if my fingers were on number six or number seven (index finger). This happens occasionally and not knowing is part of my MS condition – hands that are either tingling or numb and or both. These are conditions that I’m used to.

It’s also happens with my feet. Not so much during practice more so when I’m seated reading or watching TV. If my attention is somewhere else like reading I will think that my feet are crossed and then I’ll look down and discover they are not. It’s a residual effect. My feet were crossed when I started reading and at some point I uncrossed them. That crossed feeling still remained. This is an insight into how my nervous system transmits or doesn’t transmit to my brain. Those impulses are shorted along the way by those scars (sclerosis) on my nerves / brain. Sometimes they don’t make it all the way to be processed and acknowledged.

Sometimes I need to use more than one sense working to make sure that the other one is. My sense of sight validates my sense of touch. So I opened my eyes and looked down at my hand to discover I was on six.

This is just a tiny example of how MS affects me. And my pranayama practice delivers a focused mind. Breathing and counting does that. I focus on that. And sometimes because of that focus I lose track of other peripheral sensations. For instance I sit in padmasana (lotus posture) for my 20 minute pranayama practice. My knees still allow me to get into this asana and I completely forget I’m locked in. Again I’m focused on breathing and counting.

There are lots of inputs during pranayama practice; counting breaths, finger counting repetitions, breathing, metronome listening, and this morning a humming bird above my head. I was visited during my Bhramari (bee breath) breathing. This is the last part of my pranayama practice and at that exact moment to be joined by a hummingbird bird certainly was coincidental. Or maybe it was more than just that…

Did you know that hummingbirds represent a visit from a loved one and an ability to find positivity amidst challenges. I certainly didn’t so I looked it up afterwards. The visit was welcomed – I think I needed it. Thanks. Love you.

Ahimsa

(1) A mudra is a symbolic gesture or used as an aid to channel energy or prana.